Sirened

While the other republican candidates have been traveling across the US competing to win states, Rudy Giuliani has been camped out in Florida for what seems like forever. Since coming to my home state, Rudy has managed to really get the 9/11 message out. In fact, he’s done such a great job of it; that I now feel like that creepy kid from The Sixth Sense- I see 9/11 everywhere!

Whether I’m in the grocery store, on the road, in bed or playing softball in the park-Rudy has managed to instill a solid 9/11 presence in the Florida air. It’s like I can constantly smell the intermingling aroma of burning jet fuel and human flesh. In fact, I feel like a terrorist hijacked airplane could come crashing through my home right now!

But apparently all this 9/11 stuff isn’t working out for Rudy now that he’s currently running 4th in Florida polls. Seriously, what’s it going to take here people? Does Rudy actually have to fly a plane into Cinderella’s castle for this issue to resonate here??

Anyways, Rudy has shifted gears a smidge and is now running ads for the biggest tax cuts ever! It’s so comprehensive that there are even tax exemptions if you’re homeless! In fact, being homeless has the biggest tax perks (although the naysayers may argue that it’s actually being uber wealthy) so this is great news for Florida residents whose homes have been foreclosed or bums who live under a bridge. Take that John Edwards! And you thought nobody else cared about poverty like you do. 

Rudy rockin’ duh Nascar vote from flickr.

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