Sirened

Before Barack Obama claimed the democratic nomination last night, crabby old John McCain came out to complain about him because he is ageist towards young people. McCain warned old people in New Orleans that if Barack Obama gets elected president he will steal their prescription medications, sell them on the black market and use the money for crack. McCain believes this is “change you can’t believe in.”

What are changes to believe in with a McCain presidency?

-A mandate requiring restaurants to offer their senior menu to both citizens and illegal Panamanians starting at the age of 50.

-Pesky “public school” earmarks will be eliminated, only on education for women though.

-(DOPA) Department of Old People Affairs to be chaired by his mother, Roberta McCain, the 8th wonder of the world.

By the way, John McCain hilariously finished 3rd in last night’s Montana caucuses, behind Mitt Romney and Ron Paul! Congratulations to Mitt Romney on picking up 25 delegates…take it to the convention Mitt!

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