Sirened

You can add Philadelphia Flyers fans to the growing IN THE TANK list of Barack Obama supporters and/or Caribou Barbie haters. The poor hockey loving VP mom decided she’s go out to Philly on the Flyers opening night to drop the ceremonial first puck.

In yet another lousy error by the McNuggets campaign, they neglected to realize that Palin would not be well received by Philly fans. This marks the thousandth time their campaign has made a retarded blunder, yet again embarrassing itself.

Comments Off

Tonight will be a special night indeed, as Sarah Palin and Joe Biden square off in the only vice presidential debate of the election season.

I suspect it will go something like this:

Moderator: Governor Palin, why is it important to keep troops in Iraq?

Palin: We must fight them there so we don’t fight them here. Terrorists ya know, fight them over there. This is an area of expertise for me because I am an expert in foreign policy being the governor of Alaska which is in between terrorist Canada er Russia I mean. Putin is a terrorist because he flies over my home state and it’s our job to keep an eye out on him.

Moderator: How do you keep an eye on him?

Palin: Because it’s Alaska and it’s Russia with just some frozen ice hockey water in between. Speaking of which, you know the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? LIPSTICK! And not on a pig like that black fella’ said.

Moderator: Umm, ok then. Senator Biden, explain your position on withdrawing troops from Iraq?

Biden: [Crying from laughter] I’m so sorry, they prepped me for this but I just can’t help myself. She’s so cute though isn’t she? Reminds me of Dennis Kusinich’s wife, that’s the thing I like most about that guy [wiping tears from his eyes].

But seriously, Biden should be fine as long as he doesn’t do something like this to her…

1 Comment

All this Palin flogging is starting to reduce the ridicule richly deserved by both the presidential tickets. Frankly, I haven’t seen such a bucket of quivering electoral slime since Reagan got elected president the first time around.

So here’s a bunch of potshots fired by various loose cannons at all and sundry, starting with an imaginative listen at what might have ended up on John Kerry’s answering machine at the beginning of the year.

Don’t miss the links to various insulting images below the video. Viewers beware: no one who is capable of being offended by anything should look at this stuff.

That fuc*in Obama!

Sometimes black people can’t dance.

And don’t forget Snobama.

Or unicorn-in-the-background-Obama.

And McCain shan’t escape drubbing either.

and of course there’s powdered wig McCain.

Another classic: the Klan McCain endorsement.

And of course the old Hillary Clinton Liagra endorsement.

And finally, Iracolypse Now!

Comments Off

NBC news has announced that Chris Matthews and Ron Burgundy Keith Olbermann will not anchor MSNBC’s coverage during the presidential debates and on election night. Instead, David Gregory will get the nod and Matthews and Olbermann will be forced to cock fight, mostly off air.

This is serious though because MSNBC has become the counter to Fox News. Fox is obviously unfair and unbalanced and they are #1 on cable news because of it. The reason: Fox News doesn’t have to fight for an audience like CNN and MSNBC do. Those networks must share a largely left leaning audience while Fox gobbles up most of the right leaning audience.

I’ve written before on this site about how American news networks are almost equally to blame for the United States occupation of Iraq because they helped perpetuate the faulty logic that was involved in our invasion of Iraq. The media didn’t accurately report on the lack of intelligence the United States had while Hans Blix was still finding no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.

The fact that NBC has caved to the demands of the right is shameful. Fortunately, Chris Matthews can still be seen on HardBall and Keith Olbermann can still be seen on Anchorman Countdown. It’s important that the voices of leading left leaning political pundits are not shut out, otherwise the road to Tehran could become an easier one for the potential McCain/Palin administration.

photo credit: flickr

Comments Off

This has been a painful few days watching the nazi republican party convention.

The republican platform for change said it all in who their keynote speaker was. Rudy ‘9/11′ Giuliani. A man who has profited off that horrific day with book sales and based his entire presidential bid on scaring Americans into voting for him.

Fortunately Giuliani’s scare tactics didn’t work for his own political gain, even with republicans. It seemed the more people saw of Giuliani the more they disliked him. That’s why he retreated to my old home state of Florida, camped out and ran outrageous fear mongering ads. Then managed to finish 3rd in that state, dropping out with a grand total of 0 delegates.

This tired old message by republicans didn’t work in 2006 and it didn’t work for Giuliani. And it shouldn’t work for the McCain/Palin ticket in the general election. It is not un-patriotic to not always stand on your governments side, quite the contrary. “Country First” means that you put your homeland, common sense and principles before your government.

The Nazi party rallied Germans around extreme nationalism, and they made them scared of the growing power of Jews in their communities. It was for these reasons that they were able to unite the majority of their people into unjustified wars and to commit horrific atrocities against humanity.

The neo-conservatives used these same tactics to take us into Iraq and they will do the same to take us into Iran. McCain used to be a “maverick” but he is clearly no maverick these days. If elected, he will continue the backward policies of Bush/Cheney that have led the USA into economic disaster and international embarrassment. So congratulations John McCain, tonight is your night to take the helm of the new American Nazi party.

photo credit: flickr

Comments Off

For days the media has been all over the fact that separatist Gov. Sarah Palin’s 17 year old daughter Bristol is pregnant. Obama and his campaign have told everyone to lay off candidates children, something I agree with. But what is America to make of all this and who has the answers?

Luckily, respected American psychologist “Dr. Phil” decided to share his 2 cents on the Palin baby with Matt Lauer. Thank goodness for the wonderful insight from this TV personality who received his doctorate from the prestigious North Texas University.

Perhaps Dr. Phil can have a private consultation with Bristol. Of course, he then must share any new revelations with all of America.

Comments Off

The Palin debacle is well on its way to being overdone news, but it’s hard to resist speculating on the course of the John McCain Insane-in-the-Membrane Train.

Admittedly, McCain generally displays the deft political footwork of a crash test dummy. But the choice of Palin is so idiotic that there must be more to it than just poor judgment.

So if McCain consciously chose to put Alaska baked trailer trash on his ticket, why did he do it? (Don’t miss amusing photos at Perez Hilton.)

The only truly plausible theory is that he’s going after the stupid vote. With a dash of hypocrisy thrown in.

As governor of Alaska, P-Douche slashed funding for programs to help pregnant teens.

Most hilariously, McCain’s flacks are already trying to roll out the old Republican strategy of putting themselves outside the sphere of their own self-righteous moral pontification.

As reported by the Chicago Tribune: “It’s a private family matter. Life happens in families,” Steve Schmidt, McCain’s top strategist, told reporters. “If people try to politicize this, the American people will be appalled by it.”

Maybe McCain has actually found the holy grail of American Republican electioneering: an appeal exactly suited for rigid moral dictators who want to talk about having less government intervention while shrewishly legislating tons of it–laws against abortion and sex education, same-sex marriage–for everyone except themselves.

Expect McCain’s new book to show up in Borders by the end of the week: The Joy of Hypocrisy, Or How I Got Fifty Million More People to Vote in 2008.

Image courtesy of U.S. government.

1 Comment

Here’s an interesting little video highlighting McCain’s wandering eyes while Sarah Palin was introducing herself to America. Nice touch with the fiddling of the wedding ring Johnie! Oh well, this isn’t the first time John McCain has used a former beauty queen to elevate himself to higher power.

McCain met his current wife Cindy at a cocktail party while married to his other former beauty queen (but then crippled) ex-wife Carol McCain. It only took one meeting with Cindy to realize that she was the gal of his dreams, one that could help make him a senator of Arizona. And it only took one meeting with Alaskan hockey mom Sarah Palin to realize that she could make him president.

It’s too bad they didn’t converse a little more though, perhaps McSame would have realized that the abstinence education supporting Palin has a pregnant 17 year old daughter. Luckily the kids are planning to get married, whether they like it or not.

4 Comments

Sirened was only gone for a month, but during that time a ton has happened. Here are my thoughts on what has transpired, in chronological order from super stale to semi fresh.

The John Edwards affair: Didn’t surprise me at all. How can you trust a guy who says fighting poverty has become his life’s mission and then goes out and gets a $400 haircut, then runs an ad that poor people helped fund to discuss “how pretty” he is. Thank goodness Edwards didn’t win the democratic nomination. Then again, it would have made for a hell of an interesting convention! Much more interesting than the little dog and pony show we witnessed.

Olympic Games in China: Good stuff. Every oppressive regime should get to hold an Olympics, cause why not? And the Chinese proved that putting on the greatest opening ceremonies ever requires personal sacrifice, mainly gross human rights violations that included performers having to train in diapers. You gots to love the 21st century Olympic spirit!

Obama’s pick of Joe Biden. Solid pick but boring. Barack Obama is a very smart man with excellent judgement and I knew he’d make a good VP choice. In short, an old white guy.

The DNC Convention: Jesus Christ what was that? Nancy Pelosi looked like she was presenting at the Oscars or something. And the role call? What a cute touch with Hillary ending it and passing the Clintonian torch to Barack Obama.

Obama’s democratic acceptance speech: Great speech! But how the hell does he realistically plan to cut taxes and pay for all that, while the United States has been placed in a 9 trillion dollar deficit. He perhaps should have went with listen, things are pretty fucked up, I’ll work over the next 4-8 years to get the ship turned around, then the next guy can stear us back on course.

McCain’s choice of Sarah Palin: LOL! I have to say, I was really hoping for Mitt Romney because I find his bullshit demeanor hysterical- though I knew it would not happen after the democrats made an issue of all the McCain houses. Damnit, you guys jumped the gun! But John McBush checking out Palin’s ass just after she was introduced as his VP choice was classic stuff. So John McInsane. Apparently McCain thinks that some Americans are stupid enough to believe that Sarah Palin is an acceptable replacement for Hillary Clinton because hey, she’s a woman too. Good call on the part of McCain’s aides, too many Americans are just that stupid.

Comments Off