Al Gore’s elitist endorsement of Barack Obama last night was huge. If there is one area that Obama needs to solidify, it’s the latte sipping, Prius driving, gay marriage parade, save the whales foundation, vegan hippie elitists. Al Gore gives Barack Obama this much needed boost.

And was there a more fitting place than Detroit, Michigan to unveil this century’s most prominent elitist? For decades, Detroit has experienced what some may call a “cultural renaissance.” Former auto factories where people once toiled have been closed down to become museums, reminders of a harsh working class past.

With the auto industry a thing of history, residents of Michigan are left with a lot of free time to enjoy their temperate climate, sitting on patios, enjoying the sun, sipping on lattes. This is the group Obama has so desperately courted and the reason he appeared with Sir. Al Gore in Detroit.

So Obama is in great shape now as he has long since locked up white working class voters who are bitter about guns and butter, or something. Also, man hating feminists-this group has a lot to say about Obama, check the Googles.

photo credit: flickr creative commons

Post from: Sirened

Gore didn’t hold back from scaring everyone though. He threatened major polluting nations saying that they must act or ”stand accountable before history for their failure to act.” Being that this was aimed particularly at the USA, China and India should we consider his remarks an act of war? Will major polluting nations form an alliance and declare a war on Gore?

Gore further added “We must quickly mobilize our civilization with the urgency and resolve that has previously been seen only when nations mobilized for war.” Was this another one of those war-for-peace rally speeches? If so, I don’t think anybody is going to buy it, unless it has something to do with gas guzzling F-14’s bombing Iran.

Al Gore and Indian guy from CNN

Post from: Sirened

Anyways, the UN compiles their annual list with boring statistics that include how much money people make, the cost of their dwellings, air quality and a lack of AIDS, people without clothing and human waste present on the ground.

So this year’s top 5 came out like this:

1)Iceland

2)Norway

3)Australia

4)Canada

5)Ireland

The USA came in 12th, dropping from 8th last year. Although, I think they should categorize Alaska separately from the rest of the USA because after the sea levels rise it will become a whole lot more desirable to live there!

Happy bathing Icelanders from this joint.

Post from: Sirened

Today was the first time Al Gore and George Bush stood side by side, since well, I think the debates back in 1999 when Al Gore was sighing into his microphone as Bushie babbled on about issues he had no clue of.

Al Gore was awarded the Nobel Prize for inventing global warming and thus, as part of White House tradition, he was invited for awkward photo ops at the White House. The two also had a private 40 minute meeting where Al Gore explained his movie to George Bush with fun caricatures.

Photo from the pinkies at the NY Times.

Post from: Sirened

This is another great notch in Al Gore’s belt and he can put his Nobel next to his Academy Award on his bedroom night stand. Other great accomplishments for Gore include being elected president of the USA in 2000 and declaring that he had invented the most useful innovation of our time, the internet. Subsequently, ‘The Decider’ decided to invent something called “the internets” and that is the program I currently use. It is like Al Gore’s internet but different.

It’s not clear what Al Gore will do next. Many would like to see him elected president again; others would like to see him get elected and have Bush declare the elections invalid due to the war on terror. And others would like to tar and feather Al Gore and drive their SUV’s through him.

Gore has put on some weight over the years but with some solid training and advice from Balco he could make a run at World’s Strongest Man. Or he could go the other way and train for the Nathan’s hot dog eating contest and give Kobayashi and Joey Chestnut a solid run for the toilet. Who knows, with Al Gore the skies the limit, unless he discovers that it is falling.

Post from: Sirened

According to this chart on Opensecrets.org Hillary Clinton has raised the most money at $63 million and Barack Obama has raised the 2nd most at $59 million. It really is mind boggling, we are still 6 months from the Democratic primaries (and 16 months before the general election) and just these two candidates have raised over $120 million!

Typically it’s the Republican candidates who edge the Dems in fundraising but not this time. Mitt Romney leads the Republicans with over $44 million raised and Rudy Giuliani is 2nd with over $35 million.

So the top 2 Democrats have raised more than $40 million more than the top 2 Republicans! And thus far, if you combine what all the candidates have spent it amounts to more than $130 million!

It would be one thing if politicians had zero access to having their face shown and voices heard on TV but that is far from the case. Watch any of the major news networks and your bound to see a few presidential candidates putting their 2 cents in about some pressing matter. And debates…both sides of the aisle have already had 3 of them. The debates are a free opportunity for candidates to get their message across to those that are watching.

So where does all the money go? It pays their expenses to show their faces in as many key states as possible and creating big hoopla wherever they go. Banners and posters for all, yay candidates! It pays for TV ads, I remember seeing some Mitt Romney ads here in Florida a few months back, so no surprise that he has spent the most of the candidates so far, $32 million! And it pays the salaries of key advisors who gather information on what people want to hear and thus shapes the respective political candidate’s voice.

All the money raised according to the books is from individual donations and there is a cap on the amount people are allowed to donate. The maximum an individual can donate is $2,300 for the primary elections and another $2,300 for the general elections. So when we donate, we are looking to buy our candidate, the person we feel best represents our vision and values for the direction of our nation.

So what is the best politician money can buy? Is it the candidate who most closely thinks like we do and will do their best to represent our best interests? Or is it the candidate whom we feel is the most honest and represents the best interests of the greatest number of Americans, thus having a more egalitarian vision?

This country is a republic, not a democracy. That is why we don’t have an equal voice in political matters; we elect individuals who are supposed to be more knowledgeable to make tough decisions on our behalf.

When we went to war in Iraq, the majority of Americans believed the war was just. Now the majority of Americans believe we should leave Iraq. If this was a true democracy we would already be out of Iraq, but as a republic, our elected officials have kept us there because they still believe it is in our best interests to be there.

So as an American it is very important that we purchase the best candidate for the future of our country. The stakes are high, the price tag is high and the candidate with the most money will most likely win.

Post from: Sirened

10)Mark Foley leaves Congress because of underage sex allegations and still almost wins with name on ballot.

9)Donald Trump allows wild Miss USA Tara Conner to keep crown, doesn’t get to use his trademark your fired.

Al Gore releases film on global warming and prances around like a movie star. George Bush refuses to watch his silly little movie.

7)Crotchety old Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska reveals that the internet is a series of tubes and too much non corporate clutter can clog the tubes and interfere with his email.

6)Hugo Chavez calls George Bush the devil and then shakes hands with Danny Glover. It is the only time many people have seen Danny Glover all year.

5)Mel Gibson blames the Jews for all the wars in the world, leaving many to wonder what has gone haywire with former Lethal Weapon stars.

4)Rummy finally gets the axe. Dick Cheney declares him the finest Defense Secretary in the history of the USA. WTF???

3)Virginia Senator George Allen calls an American born Indian a monkey, costs the Republicans the Senate.

2)Republicans lose both the House and Senate, Democrats get credit for winning them.

1)George Bush still has no fucking clue.

Post from: Sirened

Corn has become so important to our livelihood that it is now competing with fueling our cars. Now that ethanol is increasing as an alternative fuel source, particularly in the midwest, it may start putting a straight on the corn industry and drive the price up. Particularly with global warming.

Some scientists believe that because of global warming, we have to change the makeup of our agriculture to withstand harsher temperature changes. Of course, if your town in Latin America is wiped out by a monsoon, well, your are shit out of luck there.

Of course, George Bush doesn’t believe in global warming. He believes in what the House of Saud tells him to believe in because what is good for their family is good for his too. But it’s cool to think that next time you have nothing to eat but a can of corned beef hash, that soon it will have hybrid corn.

Post from: Sirened