Sirened

Last week on the Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert announced that he was rooting for the New Orleans Saints to win the Super Bowl. He said that if the Saints won, the city would be so overjoyed that it would be like Hurricane Katrina never happened. Therefore, the Bush administration would be pardoned from the incompetence they showed following the disaster.
Unfortunately, that did not happen as the Chicago Bears defeated them 39-14. That means George Bush is still responsible for “not caring about black people.”

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2007 only began 3 weeks ago and yet we already have a multitude of candidates who have either declared they are running or forming committees to run. They are a diverse group ranging from the half black, laid back Barack Obama to the coal up the ass, hard liner John McCain.
With all this diversity and illegal immigration being a problem, we feel there should be a Mexican candidate for President. How about Pedro from the film Napolean Dynamite? No candidate yet has promised to make all our dreams come true, if elected, Pedro does. So vote for Pedro!

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Last night a jubilant Stephen Colbert greeted hate mongrel Bill O’Reilly of the O’Reilly Factor of Fox’s faux news. While Stephen was very excited, Bill was not as excited, admitting his visit was probably a mistake.
O’Reilly appeared on the Colbert Report to promote his book “Culture Warrior.” Stephen proudly displayed the book with a 30% off sticker that covered O’Reilly’s face. Stephen initially said he had read the book but then admitted that he did not as he does not like to read.
It was interesting to see O’Reilly on the show that is primarily a spoof on him. We’ll see if Colbert …read more

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For many non-smokers, state cigarette tax is seemingly a non factor. Many non-smokers don’t even know what the going price of cigarettes are. Why should they? They don’t buy them.
The price of cigarettes does affect non-smokers however. States with low cigarette taxes means Big Tobacco is getting a break in their state at their expense. It undoubtedly means that their tax money is footing some of the medical costs of smokers.
Smokers may moan and groan about it, but the tax on cigarettes should be high. While cigarette prices are fairly inelastic among smokers (similar to gasoline), it does discourage some smokers while …read more

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Happy New Year everyone! We hope you brought in the new year with raucous debauchery, or at least some debauchery, or at least some fun. Sirened looks forward to reporting on a new year of scandalous political and business stories. Please leave comments telling us if you like us or think we are garbage.

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Everyone have a very Merry Christmas, if you don’t celebrate Christmas, enjoy the day off and have some beers. Everyone have a very happy and safe New Years, if you don’t celebrate New Years, enjoy the day off and have some beers. See you next year!

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10)Mark Foley leaves Congress because of underage sex allegations and still almost wins with name on ballot.
9)Donald Trump allows wild Miss USA Tara Conner to keep crown, doesn’t get to use his trademark your fired.
Al Gore releases film on global warming and prances around like a movie star. George Bush refuses to watch his silly little movie.
7)Crotchety old Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska reveals that the internet is a series of tubes and too much non corporate clutter can clog the tubes and interfere with his email.
6)Hugo Chavez calls George Bush the devil and then shakes hands with Danny Glover. It is the only time many people have …read more

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 In the last few weeks we’ve seen two major restaurant chains make a lot of people sick. First it was Taco Bell, that’s not a huge surprise, they use Grade D meat. But Olive Garden? It’s nicer and corporate, so it’s super controlled. 
These things happen but it’s curious that the Indianapolis Olive Garden made 300 people sick and it happened no place else. We’ve heard several possible reasons for the mass sickness. One linking a sick worker with making everyone else ill. That doesn’t make too much sense unless this is some super contagious person who should be locked up in quarantine.
No one has …read more

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Over the past several years, the White House has done a Barney Christmas video for the holidays. George Bush has said he will wait until January to make any changes with regards to Iraq. Obviously, he doesn’t want to deal with it right now, shit, it’s Christmas man!
But Bush and company had time to do the Barney Christmas special once again. Here we see John Stewart on the Daily Show and their re-mastered version of the Barney Christmas special. Good times and fuck trying to fix Iraq while everyone just wants to get drunk and enjoy a cute dog …read more

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Yes, Northwest Airlines offers convenient service to Minneapolis-Saint Paul, whether you like it or not. It, like several other airlines, has started charging extra for window seats. It’s called economy plus or as we like to call it, a total crock of shit.
When you do express check in and have already been assigned an aisle seat, if you try and change to a window seat you will get a new surprise, an extra charge of at least $15! Does economy plus include anything extra, like a sandwich or something other than fake friendliness? Nope, just the window.
It’s amazing how they are making flying suckier and …read more

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