There’s a few reasons why Koreans have beef with American beef. One is that Koreans view American beef to have a higher risk of mad cow disease. Even though there hasn’t been that many cases of the disease in the United States, some of the beef that the United States exports are from cattle over 30 months old, an age deemed to have a higher risk of having mad cow disease.

The other reason is Big Korean Beef who wants to minimize the competition for the sake of their bottom line-and hey it’s in their interests. But if both Korean suppliers and Korean consumers are pissed, why is their government forcing the issue and hell, willing to resign over it? Because the US government has told Korean officials that the free trade agreement they worked out will not pass through Congress unless we could sell them our beef. And since the Koreans have lots of cars to sell us, it’s really in their interests to buy our beef.

But it isn’t just Koreans who have beef with our beef. American beef has been banned in Europe for more than a decade. The reason is the use of unsafe hormones in American beef and a correlation between those hormones and higher risks of cancer.

Of course, if we didn’t pump unnatural hormones into our cattle, how on Earth could we get a $9.99 T-Bone steak special at the Sizzler? And if we couldn’t get that special at the Sizzler, well, that would just be un-American damnit!

photo credit: flickr creative commons

Post from: Sirened

Remember back in the day when you used to have to go to Blockbuster or your local porn in the back/regular video store up front place to rent movies? It was a real drag because it meant actual physical exertion-walking to your car, driving the car, walking from the car to the store and walking around the store in your movie search. And you had to actually exchange words with the stoned kid working there. All that hassle, when all the while you just wanted to sit on your ass, eat popcorn and watch the moving pictures tell a fictional story.

It’s amazing that it wasn’t that long ago that we had to endure such pains just to rent a movie-it’s like it was a freakin’ errand! Especially since nobody came and picked it up from our homes when we were finished with it. Bastards! Anyways, The Onion looks back on these primitive times.

Post from: Sirened

We then spent the rest of the day walking and drinking around central Amsterdam. The city was completely overrun by people and subsequently garbage. And for some reason, drunk people seem to think it’s cool to throw their empty beer cans into the canals.

This was the biggest party I’ve ever seen, I’ve been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans but this was even bigger. Part of it was because not only were the streets packed, but the canals were packed with boats, many of which were packed with people. There were so many boats in the busiest canals that if you had to use the bathroom you could just jump boats to get out of the canal (or use the canal of course). Mardi Gras in New Orleans is also more controlled, while there were Dutch police around, I personally didn’t see anyone get arrested, despite the drunken anarchy throughout the city.

When the sun went down we decided to start making our way home so as not to deal with the crowded public transportation. And we made the otherwise hour long walk home an event since we turned it into a pub crawl. The first bar we stopped in was very local and people were unwinding from a long Queen’s Day. We talked to a few Dutch people that said they don’t like Queen’s Day because they don’t like having an ambiguous Queen, even though this massive national holiday isn’t about the Queen anymore.

Queen’s Day is a fantastic event that I highly recommend, but if you ever want to come for one in Amsterdam make sure to book a hotel or hostel 6 months in advance. This place gets packed!

I’ll be showing more Queen’s Day pictures later this week in my Jackass Amsterdam Pictures of the Week.

Photo Credit: Personal Collection

Post from: Sirened

These days though, Craig’s List has become as well known for its scams as it is for legitimate content. Luckily many of the scams are pretty obvious, like anything that involves the country of Nigeria. It’s amazing how unoriginal many of the scam artists are, so many involved in apartment rentals are “Nigerian ministers” with poor English grammar who want you to take good care of their property, blah blah, send them the money and they’ll send you the keys. Type in just about any city in the world on Craig’s List and you’ll find these “ministers.”

When my wife and I recently relocated from Tampa, FL to Amsterdam, Netherlands we were extremely frustrated at the difficulty in finding legitimate apartment listings for Amsterdam on Craig’s List. But part of me kept thinking, why are they all in Nigeria? Aren’t there people in say Burma or Somalia that want some of this action? There’s plenty of dirt poor countries out there, why is it always Nigeria? And if I went to Nigeria, how easy would it be to actually meet some of these “ministers?” (By the way, if I do this trip I’ll be sure to let you guys know!)

The founder of Craig’s List, Craig Newmark, prides himself and his tiny staff for offering a great service at little to no cost and for not having sold the site for a few billion dollars. Craig and company argue that because of the large amount of transactions and anonymity they have no idea how much money, items and sexual favors pass through the site each day. Craig’s List does have a flagging system for scams but many believe this isn’t enough. Some feel that people should be able to leave direct comments on a post they know is a scam. Others believe there should at least be a $1 fee to post something in order to reduce scams.

Personally, I think that a spam bot should remove any post that includes “Nigeria” and “minister” in it. At the very least this would allow the people of Cameroon to take advantage of the highly lucrative Craig’s List scam business.

Post from: Sirened

For starters, consumers will have less choice as to what carrier they choose to fly on many routes.

The proposed merger will also create the United States largest airline. In a mass email I received from Northwest today, sent to members of WorldPerks, their frequent flyer program, Northwest stated that “We will be the only U.S. airline to offer direct service from the United States to all of the world’s major business centers in Asia, Latin America, Europe, Africa and around North America.”

The merger of Delta and Northwest will mean the end of the name Northwest as the airline will simply merge into a giant Delta empire of staff and planes. Northwest says that the merger will take 6-8 months to be approved and until then the airlines will continue to operate separately. The benefit for WorldPerks members is that “Once the new Delta Air Lines emerges you can look forward to being a part of the world’s largest frequent flyer program with expanded benefits.”

As a frequent flyer of both Delta and Northwest, I have mixed feelings on the merger. I now reside in Amsterdam and both Delta and Northwest offer flights from Amsterdam to the United States. The merger will mean I have less choice and price options when flying back to the US to see friends and family. On the plus side, my frequent flyer miles will merge leaving me with a large stash of miles and more options as to how I want to use them.

Personally, I hope the merger doesn’t go through though as I view the deal as anti-competitive in the long run. The airlines are promising to keep all their hubs and staff, but whether that promise is kept remains to be seen.

Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

Post from: Sirened

To keep this simple I’m just going to list the 10 most heavily taxed countries for single people with no children. I figure this is a good bracket to look at since most of us have fallen into this category at some point, even if we aren’t today.

These tax rates are based on OECD findings for 2006 and look at the average percentage of total taxes paid on earnings (income, social security, health care, etc).

10)Poland-43.7%

9)Finland-44.1%

8)Netherlands-44.4%

7)Italy-45.2 %

6)Sweden-47.9%

5)Austria-48.1%

4)France-50.2%

3)Hungary-51.0%

2)Germany-52.5%

1)Belgium-55.1%!

Wow. Belgians not only like waffles but they sure do like taxes! I know Europeans generally believe in paying higher taxes for the greater good of society, but what on Earth is the Belgian government doing? I don’t see them with 150,00 troops stationed in some cursed Middle Eastern country.

A few other interesting countries of note are The United States at 28.9%, Canada at 32.1%, Australia at 28.1% and the country that the UN recently named the best country to live, Iceland at 28.6%. It’s interesting to see how similar these tax rates are and the fact that the United States is the only one of these four that doesn’t offer socialized health care. So Americans, take it easy with those delicious Belgian waffles.

Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

Post from: Sirened

Not really, but Wal-Mart decided to sponsor this episode of Sesame Street where Elmo’s dad goes off to war. This of course makes Elmo sad and since Elmo is so egocentric as to refer to himself in the third person constantly, everything is immediately focused on Elmo and not Elmo’s daddy who could get blown to smithereens in the coming 15 months.

Of course, daddy getting blown up would make Elmo sad too, but this wasn’t discussed. Instead the focus shifts to how Elmo kills the time while his daddy is away-mostly the same stuff Elmo was doing when his southern drawled daddy was around; except Elmo gets a trumpet and learns to use web cam. Also, many real kids who are not pretend conceded monsters are shown facing the real issues of their daddy’s being away at war.

Being that I don’t have kids, I hadn’t seen any of Sesame Street in well, a very long time. Among other things I did find this episode to be somewhat amusing (as well as disturbing). To watch it, go to Sesame Street’s website. On a side note, if your child has difficulty remembering Elmo’s name, please get them on Ritalin immediately. And speaking of drugs, if Elmo stopped thinking about himself for a moment, Elmo might realize that daddy needs anti-depressants for post traumatic stress disorder.

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons 

Post from: Sirened

But perhaps the proposal was a little too risky for many, especially considering that many cannot find Canada on a map let alone try to sort out banking details with an elder African tribesman. So this idea is much less risky and you don’t have to deal with strange foreigners…

Put the children to work! Child labor laws need to be reversed. Back in the day kids earned their keep, kept their manners and ate the overcooked vegetables and stale bread they were given. When they were lucky Dad would go and slaughter a pig in the yard and the kids would get some delicious pork rind for a treat.

These days kids have it too good, not only do they not provide for the household, they in fact suck the precious resources from the family treasury with all their needy requests and wants-Playstations, Barbies, bicycles, Disney, braces and the list goes on. Kids need to learn the value of balancing a check book and being in the black, instead of a perpetual red throughout pimplehood.

With all the needs of society, how is a regular joe supposed to provide for his wife, children and mistress without refinancing his castle? Something has to give and that something is the hippie kids who keep taking and not giving back. Now I’m not suggesting the kids should work in mills or shoe factories, but 10 cents a pop for lemonade just doesn’t cut it. Kids need to learn about the American entrepreneurial spirit and that means not stopping at just one lemonade stand but branching it into a powerful juice empire.

Kids need to learn the value of hiring and firing employees and the nature of crushing competition. Once they understand these principles they will be able to generate enough money to not only pay for themselves but also that lavish trip to Aspen you’ve been planning. And don’t be duped by “I love you” and “please, I just want to go home,” stay strong and start counting the cash!

Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons

Post from: Sirened

Open a Nigerian Bank Account: We’ve all gotten the emails, Nigerians have more money than they know what to do with. That’s why they’re always offering to give it away!

I was just watching CNN International and actually saw a commercial for a Nigerian bank (I wish I caught the name). But I thought it was pretty fantastic that uber wealthy Nigerian banks want to offer everyone a piece of their golden money pie.

This website has a list of Nigerian banks and also has some advertising for Nigerian girls (if that’s your bag). Now, your next question might be ‘which Nigerian bank should I go with?’ or ‘isn’t this risky?’ Well, it doesn’t matter which Nigerian bank you go with and no it’s not risky because Nigerians crap money. I don’t have the tables in front of me but I believe their locked box with no key savings account yields about 1 million percent (shortly after your death). Don’t touch their equity loans though-ouch! I believe defaulting on those loans results in genital shocking and/or decapitation.

Photo from Flickr Creative Commons

Post from: Sirened

It’s not what you might otherwise think from the picture, they don’t get transfered to 12 year old kids in India (although they should!). Especially considering what does happen if you reply.

According to this story from the Washington Post they go to Chet Faliszek’s email. Who the hell is that you ask? Good question! He’s the man that gets all the replies to do not reply!

Now the next question is why? Why don’t they vanish or go to Indian kids? Because back in 2000, Chet and some friends decided to buy up a bunch of web addresses including donotreply.com. Most of the emails Chet receives are in response to spam but some major corporations have sent emails with the address donotreply.com. One notable one is Capitol One. Chet has also received sensitive information about Iraq from the company Kellog Brown & Root (a former subsidiary of Halliburton). If you have any questions please ask at DoNotReply.com.

Photo from Wikimedia Commons 

Post from: Sirened