I guess Bush and company were hoping that Congress wouldn’t read this thing and just say, ok here is your 700 billion dollars Mr. Decider. Then when Congress actually read the proposal and had issues and questions, the administration was like you guys need to pass this like yesterday otherwise people will be eating rats off the street tomorrow.

Then after it became clear that Congress would not simply roll over for Bush, he became willing to make some concessions (like adhering to the constitution for a change). So given the magnitude of the event, Bush kinda felt compelled to come out and try to explain how everything got all screwed up.

Bush’s tone was interesting, much more mellow than some of his previous addresses on big events like RAH, Scary Terrorists, RAH, 9-11, RAH, Mass Destruction, RAH, Dick Cheney eats babies, RAH. Don’t get me wrong, he still does a good job of trying to scare us shit less, the tone was just down a notch.

Though I’m confused because John McCain said the fundamentals of the economy are strong.

Post from: Sirened

Last week the AP and Yahoo released statistics of a survey they conducted amongst over 2,000 white people. The pollsters stated positive and negative adjectives about black people and asked people to respond accordingly. 20% of all the white people polled said the word “violent” strongly applied to black people. Not good news for Barack Obama-the militant black candidate in the eyes of many white people, this despite Obama being half white of course.

Here is John McCain’s latest TV ad basically telling people that Barack Obama is a Chicago thug and that’s not change you can believe in.

Post from: Sirened

Oh really. You mean the one where rich people got huge tax breaks so they could invest in sub-prime mortgages in order for little bread crumbs to trickle down for American Oliver Twist types? Yeah that one, the one that allowed itself to run wild in a big circle jerk fuck fest that gobbled up everything in its path and left only blood stained remnants on the desert streets of Iraq.

This is the same economy that you want more of, more tax breaks for the ultra wealthy and less regulations on flesh eating succubus corporations. Even former FED chair Alan Greenspan has called McCain’s tax plan irresponsible. Also noting that the growing disparity in American wealth is not sustainable. And that guy is republican and knows just a thing or two about the economy.

So do you really want to have a commission investigate this John McCain? I really hope you have some of your guys look into this and weeks later they come back and simply present to you this picture, no words, just this.

photo credit: flickr

Post from: Sirened

His latest “gaffe” was this morning as he accidentally used the word battalion instead of brigade.

You have to be shitting me, having this on the front page during their convention, “attacking” the vice presidential nominee. All the while their presidential nominee isn’t even sure if he has his pants on or not.

Things sure are looking splendid for the GOP come November’s election with McNuts and Miss Separatist on their ticket. Thank god for the Biden gaffe ticker though!

photo credit: flickr 

Post from: Sirened

In case you missed it last night here is President George-John “Insane in the Membrane” BuCain endorsing the real change, “country first” candidate. You know, the one that voted with itself 90% of the time.

Probably the best thing Bush could have done for McCain would have been to come out and endorse Barack Obama.

But notice how John McCain wasn’t at the convention last night when Bush was speaking and how we never see them together these days. Is it possible that they, in fact, really are the same person now!?!

Post from: Sirened

Here’s an interesting little video highlighting McCain’s wandering eyes while Sarah Palin was introducing herself to America. Nice touch with the fiddling of the wedding ring Johnie! Oh well, this isn’t the first time John McCain has used a former beauty queen to elevate himself to higher power.

McCain met his current wife Cindy at a cocktail party while married to his other former beauty queen (but then crippled) ex-wife Carol McCain. It only took one meeting with Cindy to realize that she was the gal of his dreams, one that could help make him a senator of Arizona. And it only took one meeting with Alaskan hockey mom Sarah Palin to realize that she could make him president.

It’s too bad they didn’t converse a little more though, perhaps McSame would have realized that the abstinence education supporting Palin has a pregnant 17 year old daughter. Luckily the kids are planning to get married, whether they like it or not.

Post from: Sirened

Gustav has already been a thorn in the ass of McCain and the GOP, landing right at the start of their convention. Hmm, is Gustav a sign of some sort? I think it was Pat Robertson who said that Hurricane Katrina was God’s punishment on America for being too nice to the gays. So what is God saying with Gustav?

Perhaps God is trying to tell us that America is swirling in the right direction, and thus John McCain can be the only logical choice for freedom loving Americans who hate Nazi’s and Arabs named Guztav. Though republicans have to be relieved that there is a legitimate excuse for George Bush and Dick Cheney to not show up at this week’s RNC. Republicans were kinda scratching their heads about what to do with America’s two biggest war criminals at their convention…thanks Gustav.

And on a side note, I am also declaring war on the Carolina Hurricanes hockey team who won the Stanley Cup 3 seasons ago when they beat my beloved Buffalo Sabres in 7 games in the Eastern conference finals. So to recap, we have declared war on hurricanes, people named Gustav, Sweden and the Carolina Hurricanes.

photo credit: flickr 

Post from: Sirened

The John Edwards affair: Didn’t surprise me at all. How can you trust a guy who says fighting poverty has become his life’s mission and then goes out and gets a $400 haircut, then runs an ad that poor people helped fund to discuss “how pretty” he is. Thank goodness Edwards didn’t win the democratic nomination. Then again, it would have made for a hell of an interesting convention! Much more interesting than the little dog and pony show we witnessed.

Olympic Games in China: Good stuff. Every oppressive regime should get to hold an Olympics, cause why not? And the Chinese proved that putting on the greatest opening ceremonies ever requires personal sacrifice, mainly gross human rights violations that included performers having to train in diapers. You gots to love the 21st century Olympic spirit!

Obama’s pick of Joe Biden. Solid pick but boring. Barack Obama is a very smart man with excellent judgement and I knew he’d make a good VP choice. In short, an old white guy.

The DNC Convention: Jesus Christ what was that? Nancy Pelosi looked like she was presenting at the Oscars or something. And the role call? What a cute touch with Hillary ending it and passing the Clintonian torch to Barack Obama.

Obama’s democratic acceptance speech: Great speech! But how the hell does he realistically plan to cut taxes and pay for all that, while the United States has been placed in a 9 trillion dollar deficit. He perhaps should have went with listen, things are pretty fucked up, I’ll work over the next 4-8 years to get the ship turned around, then the next guy can stear us back on course.

McCain’s choice of Sarah Palin: LOL! I have to say, I was really hoping for Mitt Romney because I find his bullshit demeanor hysterical- though I knew it would not happen after the democrats made an issue of all the McCain houses. Damnit, you guys jumped the gun! But John McBush checking out Palin’s ass just after she was introduced as his VP choice was classic stuff. So John McInsane. Apparently McCain thinks that some Americans are stupid enough to believe that Sarah Palin is an acceptable replacement for Hillary Clinton because hey, she’s a woman too. Good call on the part of McCain’s aides, too many Americans are just that stupid.

Post from: Sirened

Yesterday was just another day in John McCain’s train wreck journey toward the White House. Here we see George-John BuCain telling everyone to stay out of the sun, while standing in the sun.

Considering the unbelievable disaster that is the current state of the United States, how many points do you think Obama would be up right now if he was white? Combine this with the fact that McCain is a bumbling old man that makes no sense and my guess is 25 points. I’d say an all white Obama would be at around 60% and McCain would be at 35%.

There would be less undecided people of course because Obama would be a white man. Having no health care or potentially having health care with a black president is a toss up for many Americans.

Post from: Sirened

Holy crap, I had to watch about two minutes of this clip before I realized this was real and not a joke. Here’s a terribly wonderful infomercial from 1994 about “mastering the internet”, featuring Napoleon Dynamites brother’s doppelganger and filmed in Florida, of course.

Did you know that in 1994 there were 10,000 people using Al Gore’s internets?-”And in the next decade that number is expected to go up by 50%.” Wow, he really goes out on a limb with that projection. I mean seriously, he really thought that 15,000 people would be on the internet by 2004? Yeah sure, and the United States government would owe billions to China!

Anyways, speaking of mastering internets, John McCain admits he is starting to learn. In a recent New York Times interview, McCain said that for now, his staffers open the internets for him but says “I am learning to get online myself, and I will have that down fairly soon, getting on myself.”

Wow, McCain simply must pick up these wonderful video tapes about mastering internet tubes. If he did he would have access to powerful tools, such as finding out the weather in Dallas…in just 10 minutes. So George BuCain, what are you waiting for? Call today!

Post from: Sirened